The golden rule goes something like this…”Do unto others what you would have them do unto you.”
I’m in a position where I’m both a stepmom AND a mom. Thing 1 and 2 had a stepmom and their dad is engaged to be married, meaning they’ll have a new stepmom at some point in time.
I’ve heard horror stories about biological mothers and how they treat their children’s stepmothers and I don’t want to be that woman. (Although I fear I might have been in the beginning!)
I’ve learned that I want to be the stepmom to my step kids that I want my own biological children to have. That doesn’t necessarily mean I have to agree with everything she does, but I want her to treat my kids the same way that I treat my step kids.
Jennifer was my kids’ stepmom for eight years or so. We weren’t BFFs or anything, but we got along very well. It took some time, but we got to the point where holiday dinners and double dating were not unusual things for us. My kids loved her. She was into makeup (she sold Mary Kay) and so she helped Thing 2 in that arena because I have no clue.
But the biggest thing she did was go above and beyond for my kids and do things she didn’t have to.
I recognized it and I appreciated it.
I’d be lying if I said we didn’t miss Jennifer, because we do, but we still keep in touch with her. She was a huge part of my kids’ lives.
And she was a huge influence on the type of stepmom I am to Thing 3 and 4 because she was the first one to ever show me what a good stepmom looked like.
And for that, I am grateful.